Freyja and Pinterest

For weeks now I have heard the call of the Goddess Freyja. Seeing her image in many different places and just feeling that strong pull to work with her. SO last night on Friday the 13th I did just that, and had a lovely ritual and felt so empowered afterwards it was a great feeling.


I used the oils I bought from a shop on Etsy as well called Artisan Witchcrafts . You should check them out! I had bought a black cat oil, and a spiced rose oil both very nice oils.

I used them during ritual because Freyja is a Goddess of love and lust (rose oil), and also likes cats (black cat oil) even though from what I have read she prefers gray cats I am sure she likes them all. I mean who does not like cats? Mean people do not like cats. Well that is just one of my opinions. Although if you’re allergic I will let it slide.

So the ritual included these oils, Green tea w/cranberry, an Apple (honeycrisp), a small cat statue, and a few other things having to do with a spell. I also had a prayer to Freyja I read out loud as well. All in all it was a great ritual and I now plan to make an altar for her as soon as possible.

Than last night after all of this I was introduced to the website Pinterest! This is an awesome website and as my friend Wendi said "I went from Facebook cocaine to Pinterest crack! What have you done?” Its true Pinterest is highly addicting but so awesome. A great way to express things you like and enjoy and share with others. If you have not joined you really should find someone who can invite you.

So that was my Friday the 13th. How was yours?

Moon in Cancer

The Moon became full at 2:30 am this morning while most of us were trying to sleep. I certainly was not as I tossed and turned with my fabulous PTSD symptoms in tow. Yes it was a long night filled with emotions and a lot of guilt.

Yes Guilt!

Why?

Well I am still thinking deep down maybe if I had been a better girlfriend he would not have become abusive. Maybe if I tried harder to have kept him from drinking. My head keeps telling me its all crazy and these were his choices and it was not my fault. This does not keep me from having these feelings though. Thank the Goddess for a good therapist. She helped me see this is normal and it too shall pass.

So after my fabulous therapy I wanted to go pick up my new phone, which just caused a whole new rush of emotions mostly frustration and anger. I had to go try to pick up my new phone three times before I finally got a nice person who actually handed me my new phone. Of course now I was late for an appointment. So running around I did spend the day like the chicken with her head cut off. I was still pretty much Okay with that.

Than of course information was given to me about a past friend, lover, whatever you want to call him. Still spending time making up really stupid stuff about me. Seriously? What the hell is wrong with that guy that he needs to think or have others think I am stalking him. The question is why are you spending time talking about me. Am I right? Well after going into an emotional uproar and than spouting my anger out on Facebook. I realized what kind of friend tells me this stuff when they did not even defend me? I have always defended my friends and if I did not want to get into the middle of it. I would just say hey we are not discussing this! This topic is not in the grab bag of our day! Alrighty!

I also realized I still have a lot of emotional junk running around inside of me. Maybe I should use this Full Moon in Cancer to get some of it out. A good cleansing ritual was due.

So after gathering some supplies including my Starfish and shells I had myself a little cleansing full Moon ritual.

I started off with a shower and while using my lemon bar of soap (lemon is great for purification) I envisioned myself in white light glowing all over and around my body. Than wrapped myself up in a towel and came to the altar Skyclad. Sometimes it just feels right.

I than cleansed myself using all the elements and the Moon herself.

Moon- I used a selenite wand and rubbed it all over my body while seeing the moons full glow all around me moving all those negative thoughts and energies out.

Earth- I pinched a bit of salt all around me.

Air- I lighted my moon Incense and than my Mugwort and Sage wand and cleansed my body in the smoke.

Fire- I lit my Einganna Dragon candle and the 2 silver ball candles. I asked Einganna (which is my protection Dragon she hangs out in the hallway sometime I shall show you a picture or maybe right now.) to protect me and help me think happy positive thoughts.



Water- I drank some Iced Green tea and thought of a pale green light covering my body in emotional healing.

Spirit- I rubbed down my whole body in lotion thinking of my spirit being cleansed of all guilt, frustration, anger, and any other negative thoughts.

After all this I thanked all the elements and the Moon.

I grounded myself with my Edamame Dip and some tortilla chips. Edamame is great for growth.



I adapted this recipe from another one you can find the original at http://simplyrecipes.com/recipes/edamame_dip/

Mine is a bit different.

Edamame Dip Recipe

Ingredients

• 6 ounces of shelled Edamame frozen
  
• 1/2 cup, packed,spinach leaves
  
• 1/2 cup plain greek yogurt
• 1/2 avocado, peeled, pitted, roughly chopped
• 1/2 lime juiced
  
• 1-2 garlic cloves crushed
  
• 5 shakes of Tabasco (less or more to taste)

I also added a bit of salt as well

Method

1 Bring 1 quarts of water to a boil. Add the shelled edamame. Return to a simmer and cook for 5 minutes, or until cooked through and tender. Drain with cold water.

2 Place drained cooked edamame in a food processor. Pulse several times. Add the spinach. Pulse again. Add the remaining ingredients, and pulse until well puréed. Add salt if needed.

Serve with tortilla chips round ones for the Moon!

Makes about 1 cup

I am feeling much better and less angry now.

So here we are in 2012, and Bye Bye 2011

2012 here I come! This is the Mantra in my head for the past three days. I am looking forward to a year where my life is in a better place and improvements are made as well as less stress. So I push forward and so far feel like yes something amazing is going to happen this year, but its going to be good things.

Last year was a bad year not just for me but a lot of people in my community and in my life. I started off with a dear friend passing away and going off to the Summerlands. He will be missed.

Than my ex boyfriend who I had been with for 6 years or so got out of prison and I the fool thought I could handle it and I could take care of things. I only ended up in a mess of a situation. Many people will never understand what happened or how I could think that way. No one knows what one will do until the time comes it is a lesson I learned myself. I am a less judgmental person towards those who have been in abusive relationships and been through trauma because of my own situation.

Than not long after that I got myself pregnant with twins to make it even more interesting. I could not just do things the normal way. No of course not! Soon after becoming pregnant realized i really had no feeling for the Father in fact maybe I did but not the kind you usually have. To be honest even though I wanted to have more kids I was miserable in my position and was not doing well health wise either. I already had diabetes and chronic leukemia. The Doctors said it was possible but it really did not work out for me. I soon had a miscarriage and out the door the Father went. Apparently we were never even friends.

I also during all this realized many friends were not as they seemed and some I had simply outgrown and others were just not good people to begin with. I ignored the signs because i want to see the best in people and I ended up paying quite a bit for making such bad choices and judgment.

The next half of the year was dealing with court issues due to my poor decisions, and trying to get an education. I am proud to say I passed my first math class, and now in 2012 have just started the Algebra.

I lost 67 lbs. in 2011 but gained back 7 in December. A lot was coming to a head in December and so I let myself go a little. I had the Holidays some financial issues, and the end of the court situations.

I will say during all of these bad selections and facing the consequences of them I met some wonderful people who have helped me through, and some others also who stuck by me despite what others have said or tried to make them think of me. How lucky I am to have these people in my life. Friends are a precious commodity and should be treated with loyalty and delicately. Never take your friends for granted!

So here we are 2012 I have great plans for you! What are those plans you may ask.... you will see soon enough!

Blah blah

What a boring day. The rain just keeps coming so I spent the day cleaning the bathroom and than did some light reading. Really not much of a productive day at all.

Not sure I am giving Bianca Kitty a good way of looking at rainy days since she spent it watching Anime and than left to go grocery shopping with a friend. I doubt we will do much tonight either except eat tuna noodle for dinner and than go to bed. Well I will probably stay up and play words with friends because it has become my latest addiction. I so love playing Scrabble.

In fact this is not a very interesting blog post at all. I did not even bake anything today. Nope...no magic, baking, or interesting poems. Nadda!

So I leave you with this...I am still looking for a digital camera to make my blog more interesting with pics of the things i make and the places I go. If you know of anyone with a digital camera they do not want please send it my way. As mine was taken from me without any fault of my own.

Thanks and Blessings,
The Badbad Kitty

Well Its been like a year or so

I have not blogged in some time mostly because I no longer have a camera so I felt blogging without pictures was kind of wrong. It’s just not as fun, and who wants to read a blog without a pic or two. Right?

Well tonight after weighing in I realized maybe I should blog a bit about my weight loss.

To begin with I have had a hell of a year even going back to last August. I now live alone except of course for my daughter. My financial life has changed extremely. I have court cases going on in my life due to ex-boyfriend, and to my daughter's biological Father. I lost a few people to the other side (meaning they passed on). I also lost 60 lbs. than gained back ten during a short-lived pregnancy (yes I was pregnant and I had a miscarriage), and than lost 15 lbs. after that. I also am going back to school now, working on a novel, and even co-writing a graphic novel with a very talented friend. Oh and let us not forget I found out I have chronic leukemia.

A lot has happened.

Now I want to start blogging again as well. I am pretty good writer, but blogging eludes me a bit. Since to me its mostly just writing down what is going on in my life. To me its sort of an online diary you’re going to let the world read. To some that is insanity. To me its therapy. I do not mind people knowing who I am and what I am going through. I do mind being judged by those I thought were good people. Guess its better to know than keep thinking you have a good friend.

So back to my weight loss. I only lost 1/2 lb. this week. I feel like I have reached a plateau, and that does not make me happy. I think maybe I just did not exercise enough this week though. I got a little lazy the past couple days. Tomorrow I will make sure to get in my walk and a Wii fitness session.

Sorry I have no photos. If anyone would like to send me a used digital camera I would be happy to pay for shipping. I think I shall post on freecycle I am looking for one. Maybe I will get lucky.

Thanks for reading!

Weekend of Mother part 2

So the next evening I went to my sisters to see my Mom and let the cousins play. My Mother and the rest of my family were watching a baseball game on the Telly. SO i was pretty much bored out of my mind. I am not a sports person and never will be. Maybe you could get me to watch Ice Skating if i was in the right mood.

So in my boredom I took pictures. My sister did not wish to be photographed so I got her feet.



Than I got a shot of both my niece and nephew.



Than my sister showed me her gardens.







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Soon it was time to leave much to my daughters chagrin. You know how kids try to make 5 minute goodbyes last 30 minutes. So while waiting for her to pick up her stuff i got a picture of the bunny and the cat.




So Mom went home the next day, and soon after my roommate crashed the minivan so I will not be seeing my sister again anytime soon. I do have plans to see my Mother in a few weeks though as the ex husband is going to go on my vacation with me. That should be interesting.

Sorry if this blog was short and choppy and not my usual stuff. I am tired and just trying to get something on here. So you do not think I have given up altogether.

Weekend of Mother

My Mom came to visit a couple weekends ago and stayed with my sister. We had to take the minivan and go pick her up though. Which made for an interesting weekend and journey. My Mother lives on Cape Cod which this time of year is traffic central. If you have ever been to the Cape during the summer or lived there you fully understand what I am saying. If you have never been I advise you to not go and maybe go in early fall or spring traffic still not so great but you will live through it much better.

The way down was a pretty uncomplicated trip except for a short amount of time on the way to the bridge which connects the rest of Massachusetts to the Cape. I do not drive so to be honest most of the time I did not even notice what was going on. I usually read or fall asleep. I think I slept a lot which annoyed my sister I am sure. Maybe a part of me likes that. I wonder if she will read this blog?

We did not bring lunch figuring my Mother would have something to feed us when we get there. On the phone she said hot dogs but she had changed her mind by the time we got there. I wish I had taken a picture of the sandwiches my Mother made because it was not your normal everyday lunch that is for sure. Turkey sandwiches on Cinnamon Raisin bread. I did not mind them but we left a few for my brother to find later.

Getting off Cape was pure boredom because we were stuck in traffic for hours. My Mother needed to get out and walk every now and than as her legs were bothering her. SO I would go with Mother dear while my sister drove next to us. I also took pictures of strange branches or whatever pleased me as I had nothing else to really
do.




It took us eons to get to the bridge or at least it felt like it. I also started taking pictures of clouds.





When we finally got close to the bridge we stopped at a Starbucks for a bathroom break. Well it was supposed to just be for me. After I came out my Mother decided she was going to. So I bought her a water and a banana while I was waiting for her. She only ate part of the banana as it was bruised. Nothing ever is good enough for your Mother is it?

Pretty Flower.





I know that was random wasn't it?


We did finally get her to Vermont in one piece. We stopped for dinner and My Mother got us Boston Market. I had there Asian chicken salad it is really good too!

We decided I would meet up with them at my sisters house the next day after John(the roommate man thing) got out of work. SO be ready for part 2 of weekend of Mother!