2012 here I come! This is the Mantra in my head for the past three days. I am looking forward to a year where my life is in a better place and improvements are made as well as less stress. So I push forward and so far feel like yes something amazing is going to happen this year, but its going to be good things.
Last year was a bad year not just for me but a lot of people in my community and in my life. I started off with a dear friend passing away and going off to the Summerlands. He will be missed.
Than my ex boyfriend who I had been with for 6 years or so got out of prison and I the fool thought I could handle it and I could take care of things. I only ended up in a mess of a situation. Many people will never understand what happened or how I could think that way. No one knows what one will do until the time comes it is a lesson I learned myself. I am a less judgmental person towards those who have been in abusive relationships and been through trauma because of my own situation.
Than not long after that I got myself pregnant with twins to make it even more interesting. I could not just do things the normal way. No of course not! Soon after becoming pregnant realized i really had no feeling for the Father in fact maybe I did but not the kind you usually have. To be honest even though I wanted to have more kids I was miserable in my position and was not doing well health wise either. I already had diabetes and chronic leukemia. The Doctors said it was possible but it really did not work out for me. I soon had a miscarriage and out the door the Father went. Apparently we were never even friends.
I also during all this realized many friends were not as they seemed and some I had simply outgrown and others were just not good people to begin with. I ignored the signs because i want to see the best in people and I ended up paying quite a bit for making such bad choices and judgment.
The next half of the year was dealing with court issues due to my poor decisions, and trying to get an education. I am proud to say I passed my first math class, and now in 2012 have just started the Algebra.
I lost 67 lbs. in 2011 but gained back 7 in December. A lot was coming to a head in December and so I let myself go a little. I had the Holidays some financial issues, and the end of the court situations.
I will say during all of these bad selections and facing the consequences of them I met some wonderful people who have helped me through, and some others also who stuck by me despite what others have said or tried to make them think of me. How lucky I am to have these people in my life. Friends are a precious commodity and should be treated with loyalty and delicately. Never take your friends for granted!
So here we are 2012 I have great plans for you! What are those plans you may ask.... you will see soon enough!